This article is about how to groom yourself for sex…when you aren’t really expecting to get lucky, like at a kind of party that you end up going to.
Especially if there’s a get-together that includes drinking and dancing, there’s definitely going to be strangers with whom you may find common attraction. And as consenting adults, we at times like to get adventurous.
And, by adventurous I don’t mean staying up till 4 in the morning watching just one more episode of your recently favorite series when there’s a meeting at the office the next morning at 10. By adventurous I mean hooking up with strangers – given there’s consent. No need to be wondering too much about it as if it’s a taboo, it’s happening and it’s very much real. Therefore, to groom yourself for sex becomes crucial.
Sex can happen anywhere and anytime if you, as adults, let it happen! So, I had half a mind to write an article about having sexual encounters with people you don’t know and the other half was about how to groom yourself when you’re preparing to have sex at any given moment – and that includes all the safety concerns that go with it. And I thought to myself, why not merge them both?
So here’s an article where I can talk about having safe sex while preparing yourself the best possible way for it – be it with strangers or known partners. The article is divided into three sections. Each of the sections deals with different stages of getting intimate with other people – before, during, and after sex. You’ll know how to groom yourself completely before you’re done with reading this!
How Safe Is Having Sex With Strangers?
I’m not advertising you walking up to a person, disregarding their lack of interest, and pestering them to get together with you. That’s actually creepy and should not be encouraged. I’m talking of a scenario where both adults, both consenting, meet somewhere – let’s say at a party or a get-together or a club – they talk for a while, they hit it off and end up in bed together.
Casual sex should be normalized – both for men and women. I hated the way Barney was a serial womanizer, no amount of childhood trauma can justify the way he treated women. But when both the man and woman are consenting to get together – without being tricked to do so – you’ve got to make sure you’re well-groomed. I mean, it’s both safe and sexy to be prepared for sexual encounters!
That said, sex with known partners and sex with strangers might be different; but it’s a good personal practice to stay clean when getting together with anyone at all. Sex with repeating partners can make us used to be too comfortable…we can forget to buy sexy lingerie (yes, that’s a part of your personal grooming as well) or simply get too lazy to shave. Because hey, it’s just my long-term partner here, right? Wrong.
To groom yourself for sex is important both with known and unknown partners! With known partners, putting in some effort will make both of you happy. There’s something euphoric about watching your partner descend the staircase wearing something straight out of a dream sequence. And imagine fresh breath, smooth skin and an attitude to please go with it…why should only newly met partners have all the fun?
But if you’re going to be with a one-night stand or someone you’ve been with only quite a few times – basically people whose sexual history you don’t know that much about – health, hygiene, and grooming become of utmost importance to protect yourself. Then it is more than just pleasure. We all know that just kissing can be risky as well!
Proper grooming yourself for sex also includes knowing the signs that someone needs to be stayed away from. Both, in case you don’t know them that well or at all. Let’s move on to the further sections to know more about it.
But First, What Does Grooming Mean?
There are two very distinct meanings of the word ‘grooming’. One means to clean yourself up, prepare, and prep up for sex. This is what I’m going to talk about – grooming yourself for sex. There’s another meaning to this word and that’s quite sinister. When you type “sexual grooming” on the internet, that is what you often find in the search results.
Being friendly with underage people with the agenda to exploit them sexually is also called grooming. It’s a way to groom a child’s mind into believing a predator likes them and cares for them. It’s emotionally manipulative and should be prevented whenever you see any slight signs of it. At times, such sexual predators can even fool the parents of a child. I’m strictly against that kind of sexual grooming.
Keep in mind to not confuse the two meanings of the word ‘grooming’ – being informed is the key. And never ever try to groom a child for sex – those aren’t sexual favors you’re asking in exchange for love, that’s downright abuse. If anyone is here to read about grooming in the second sense, try following the link above. You could also research more about how to prevent it. I hope you can know more about it and protect a child.
Groom Yourself For Sex: The Essentials
This section will include grooming both your body and your mind. Let’s start with picking your partner first. Every long-time partner was once a stranger. If you have the time of getting to know the person, going on multiple dates with them, and maybe even taking a test together after having the talk, you’re all set for sessions of safe sex.
But what if this person was at a club and you’re both horny? Horny adults usually throw caution out the window a lot of times and just go for it. Well, as someone who advocates safe and consensual sex, there are a few things you can do without losing precious time! The first and foremost thing to do is: don’t be afraid to ask the tough questions!
These questions typically are:
- When was the last time you had any kind of sexual encounter?
- When was the last time you got tested?
- How many sexual partners do you currently have?
That’s it, it takes about 2 minutes for you to get the answers. And if they’re not favorable, get away from the person. Finding another partner is much easier than getting treated for an STD. Talking to the person for a bit can help you get to know them just a bit better.
And God forbid if something happens, getting a contact – of social media accounts, if not the phone number – can help you track down the person later. A lot of people don’t even know if they have an STD if they don’t get tested for it. Many uncommon STDs are not even tested for if you don’t specifically ask to test them.
Prevention, under these circumstances, is absolutely better than cure. So, now let’s come to the physical aspect of grooming. Staying clean and using protection (and I mean condoms) is the way to go. Now, pay attention and make a checklist because these are the things you’d want to pay attention to:
Everyone loves a freshly showered body. Especially if you’ve just had a warm shower, your skin would be scrubbed and exfoliated with your pores open and breathing! While showering, pay attention to cleaning your genitals along with your body.
A little bit of soap can be used externally to clean your breasts and butt. But make sure that the soap doesn’t go inside the holes in your body. Especially for women, the underboob area and the thighs should be cleaned. Other than this, everyone should pay attention to the neck, the underarms, and between fingers and toes.
Make sure to clean the soap off as well. Use your hands to gently rub and go between your entire body and come out of the shower clean and ready to further groom yourself for sex.
or men, they can shave their faces whenever they want. A beard might be sexy for you but if it’s not trimmed well, the pointy bristles can be harmful and lead to irritation and rash. And anyway, when you’re grooming for sex, facial hair isn’t the only hair you should be concerned with.
Your pubic hair should be shaved as well. Be sure to shave in the direction of your hair’s growth. Because the pubic hair is coarse, if you don’t do it with the utmost care, you might end up with blisters or rash. If you don’t have a vagina, you still need to consider grooming down there.
Although not always but using hair removal creams down there can lead to rashes, pigmentation, and skin irritation. It’s better to just schedule a waxing appointment if you’re not up for the hassle or the risk of infections. Two things to keep in mind:
- Whenever using any creams down there, or anywhere else, first test it out on a small patch of skin to see if your body is okay with using it.
- Never use a product on your sensitive areas if it’s expired. You should never take risks such as these.
Trim your nails and brush your teeth. Men, especially, don’t need long nails if you don’t have an appointment for a manicure later. Many people are okay with body hair, they even like it, but hair under your arms causes odor.
Clean your underarms well. If you have hair there, make sure you powder it and use antiperspirants to keep any kind of odor at bay. The hair should also be clean and washed. Technically, just follow basic hygiene.
Your underwear also needs to be clean, mind you. Make a habit of changing your underwear daily…that thing smells, you know? Remember how I said grooming means wearing nice lingerie? Well, time to shop for some sexy underwear and bras. Be it a long-time partner or if you’re showing up for a date, always be ready…remember, clean is sexy.
This pretty much sums up all you need to do if you want yourself groomed and ready for sex! You can shampoo your hair based on your washing schedule. If you plan to bring someone home, keep your house clean as well – who knows if you might end up on the kitchen table or on the bathroom floor? And if you’ve got a car box, it needs to be cleaned before your lover for the evening comes in through your door.
Getting Groovy During And After Sex!
The during part is quite elaborate. There are so many fetishes, poses, kinks, and ways you can engage in sexual encounters with your partners. After you’ve had proper grooming before sex, the ideal would be knowing or finding out what you like the most in bed. This way, you can read up and research more about that particular thing you like and practice it safely.
The most basic tips – along with using protection – for preparing for great sex would be:
Understand and respect your partner’s boundaries
If a kink or a fetish appeals to you but your partner is skeptical about it, understand that they might not be okay with me. In that case, don’t push them to do it in the heat of the moment.
If they’re a long-term partner, talk it out with them later and wait till they’re comfortable enough before bringing the subject up again. If they’re a new partner or a one-night stand, well, let it go because of boundaries and boundaries.
Mastering the foreplay with some dirty talk and sensual kissing is ideal
You want your partner to be wet, or hard. Sex isn’t something you do just for the sake of it. If you’re doing it like that, stop. Sex should be something appealing. Light candles, spray some mist around, and set up an atmosphere that makes you want to get it on.
Similarly, don’t force things. Just because you gave someone a head doesn’t mean you’ll get one. Giving a blowjob or getting your pussy licked is fun for both (or all) parties only when everyone is willing. Do it because you want to, not because you have to. And if you want to make BJs more fun, here, read this.
Don’t overthink what you’re doing or how you look
It’s not a time to be self-conscious. Do what you think will bring you pleasure. And be vocal about what you want your partner to do. Don’t be shy to introduce sex toys into the equation if that’s what you think will satisfy you. Nothing beats a good session of sex and it’s everyone’s right to be a part of one!
After sex, most people have their own set of routines that they follow. Many people want to get a cigarette – hey, it’s their thing so let them have it. In case you mind the smoke, you can obviously ask them to put it off or take it to the balcony or outside. Many others like to wash themselves off. And washing is important, yes.
If you’re someone who’s into cuddles and simply lying in each other’s arms for a while after sex, tell them that. Keep some wipes handy, in that case. The after-sex routine is different for different people. You can follow as many grooming tips as you want and read up on everything there is on the internet, but nothing beats a nice and open conversation with a partner to know more about what they’d like or want.
Final Words on How to Groom Yourself For Sex
So there you have it, an article on everything about how to groom yourself for sex. Now you know what to do before, after, and even during sex. I hope it’ll help you get an idea of what to do when you’re coming back from a date where you end up getting lucky…or end up in a bathroom at a club with a partner willing to get dirty with you…or simply a Friday night with a loved one who is extremely lucky that you’re both putting efforts to keep the spark alive and new between the two of you!